When I told him I was hungry and wanted to stop at a drive-thru, he said "I'm not hungry." I informed him that I was hungry and that I would pay for my meal. Later I thought it over and decided that maybe he wasn't hungry....maybe I was being a bit harsh. When he was done ordering, the attendant asked me what I would like, and my date said "We are going to share mine." I informed him that the sundae he ordered didn't appeal to me, and that I didn't like some of the items he had chosen. Now maybe you have heard some really terrible stories, worse than mine, but I must say: Gentlemen, if you ask a woman out to dinner or a movie, or even for an ice cream cone, let her get what she wants and be prepared for it. Reluctantly, he said I could get the kind I wanted. It can really make World War 3 jump off in your relationship if you two don't manage it carefully. Before you go and screw your life up like Carrie Bradshaw falling for the balling and generous (yet emotionally unavailable) Mr.You'll argue about how he never (OK, rarely) buys you anything. Big -- your cheap boyfriend may have great qualities that will still sustain your relationship.I therefore assumed that he wanted to invest not only time in getting to know me (which I was receptive to), but that he was also willing to make a financial investment.So, I admit my pride was at least a little wounded. Well, I interpreted his offers as an investment — that he was willing to invest in me (remember: I have two kids — investments are important! When he chose not to pay, it was clear that he wasn’t as invested in me as I assumed.I’d like to think so, but I have a feeling that my interest level in El Cheapo would still drop to zippo. Harman’s research examines relationship behaviors that put people at-risk for physical and psychological health problems, such as how feelings and beliefs about risk (e.g., sexual risk taking) can be biased when in a relationship.
Would I have felt any better if I had offered to pay for myself and he took me up on it?Research has shown that spending money and flaunting luxury items are reliable ways for a man to convey to a potential mate that he has money and resources to invest in the relationship (see here and here for more on this study). ” Therefore, I like signs of generosity such as flowers, gifts, and in this case, picking up the check, because it means a guy is willing to invest in me.It is no wonder, then, that my opinion of him dropped from being interested to “avoid-at-all costs” with that one gesture.He's certainly not husband material yet because, well, how can he contribute to a household if he can't even provide for himself?Messing with this guy can unlock Pandora's box -- and I'm not talking about the jewelry store. If his finances are together, then there are no worries.